Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Carrying the luggage!

Most people that know me or have known me for a little bit knows that I have a good friend named Jana. I LOVE HER! I ADMIRE HER. I AM CERTAIN THAT AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER I ENVIED HER! Reason why? She was always learning more and more about the love of God for her and how that opened up her heart. She was learning that she has all she needs inside her. The deed is done and we lack nothing. I looked at her and really saw a "Princess". She started teaching classes at our church. She taught at AGLOW. She taught at one of our retreats. She had a bible study in her home. I used to tell her "Jana, when you get famous and travel spreading all that you have learned I will carry you luggage to the planes." We would laugh and say ok and we would go on.

Well, today a friend emailed me and was telling me that she was advertising in a local wedding magazine for her business. I offered to help and then said to her, "Girl, when you get famous I will be your right hand man. I will carry your luggage to the plane and everything". Of course, she sent a LOL and said of course then God took over.

God said to me, "Michelle, why are always the right hand man or the luggage carrier. Why don't you dream big enough to be the one needing your luggage carried to the plane? You are worth being in the spotlight and being number one. Come out of the shadows"

I guess I never even imagined myself being "famous" or having a talent that would take me anywhere. If you don't imagine it (have the vision) you sure are never going anywhere but right where you are. The bible says in Habakkuk 2:2 "And the LORD answered me: “Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it." I never had a vision and I certainly never made it plain because I felt I never deserved it but I do. There are several scriptures that reveal that to me! Then there is this scripture:
It is Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart." but the desire has to be in your heart. Without desire in your heart what is he gonna give you?

I have come to the conclusion that I have to:
1. Know that I am good enough, smart enough and worth being #1.
2. Write the vision and make it plain.
3. Delight myself in the Lord

and one day someone will be carrying MY LUGGAGE

Friday, May 20, 2011

The Baseball Game called Life...

Funny thing! After about 8 years of walking with God I realized that I rely more on man to give to me wisdom that I do on God. I was finding that I was bummed when the latest and greatest “ministers” or “prophets” came and they had no words for me. I mean I was so upset. I would sit on the edge of my seat and wait with sweating palms but NOTHING…it was always for the “in” people as I saw it. But then, one day outta nowhere God said, “Michelle, if you want words of wisdom or knowledge just ask me! I will tell you”…well, duh!!

So for the last couple of weeks God and I have had amazing conversations. He has told me how much he loves me. He has told me how much I mean to him and how important I am. Isn’t he awesome??? That leads me here…

I had a dream a couple of nights ago. When I woke up I thought to myself, “Jason watches too much baseball because now I am dreaming about it.” Then about an hour later God nudged me…Michelle, that dream means something and this is what it means and he told me.

The dream:
A group of us (no idea who the us was just people) were at a ball game. We were all sitting around on the bleachers and hanging out. Some people had baseball gloves on their hands and they were ready. For what? I don’t know. Maybe to catch a fly ball but I wasn’t concerned. I was just enjoying the game. Do you remember in school when you would prop your elbow on the bleacher behind you and kinda snuggle you butt between the two bleachers? Well, that is how I was sitting. Really relaxed and enjoying this game. All around me people were so ready for anything. They were on their feet, they were squatted down it catch mode, I mean READY but there I was…LAID BACK! I also noticed that balls were coming at people. They were catching them with no problems but some of the balls were hitting the gloves really hard making a smacking sound. You could hear a grunt or two but nothing that really bothered me. Then, here comes a ball right at me. Oh I was a little scared. I braced myself and was ready for the hit. Then it hit me…like a feather! I looked down and the ball was not a baseball after all. It was a whiffle ball. It had no impact at all. Just a little “ploop” right in my lap! I kinda chuckled and waited for the next one. I was still waiting when I woke up.

Now even though God had already told me he was gonna tell me what it meant my first reaction was to go ask Jacob or call Heather but God quickly said, “No”. So I was obedient and I waited. Then out of nowhere it came! What the dream meant…and here it is…

Everyone I know or don’t know for that matter is gonna have life come at them. Some people are already expecting it and expect the worst. This is what the people with the gloves were doing. They knew that the pop flys would come and they were ready for the sting of the catch. Some people know that life is gonna happen and just stand there and wait with no protection or anything. The people catching the pop flys bare handed. Then there are the people that know life is coming but they sit back, enjoy life, not really concerned with what’s coming but when it comes they brace for it and then laugh when it’s a whiffle ball. These are GOD’S people. The one’s that trust God can handle life, even if it is coming at you at 100 miles an hour and will leave a pump knot the size of Texas. He is that good and that is where I am right now.

I know that life will have hurdles. I know that things will happen beyond my control but when they do I am going to sit back rested and relaxed with my butt snuggled between two bleachers and enjoy the game!

Monday, May 2, 2011

My Wedding Day:

This post is and isn’t about my wedding day. I was sitting and talking to Jason yesterday when I got home from church. We were talking about Martha Schmidt. She is this WONDERFUL woman full of wisdom that I adore. I should follow her around with a notebook to write down advice all day long.

Anyway, I got to thinking about my church family and where I would be if they didn’t exist. One word: LOST! They not only exist but they love and accept with their whole heart. They are there when you need them and do beyond what is expected. So many people have offered to help with my wedding and have opened up their lives to me without my having to ask. I wanna take a minute to just thank a few people and try to explain what they mean to me! I don’t think this happens enough!

Pastor Ron: I remember a couple of years ago you said something to me! You might not remember but I do. You said, “Michelle, don’t go low life.” Guess what? I DID. I went low life. I did all the things that you told me not to do and boy did I pay the consequences for that but you know what? When I came to my senses there you were. With open arms and ready to welcome back to the higher ground that I was called to walk on. For that I do not have enough words to express my gratitude.

Beth: I love you. You are such a role model for me. When I think about the two people I would most wanna be like when “I grow up” I think of my mom and you. Thank you for your poise and your honesty!

Rachel, Kristen and Amanda Allen (yes, I put Allen on purpose): You guys are living proof that the preacher’s kids don’t have to rebel against authority! You guys were raised by some good people and it shows!

Wayne and Audrey: When I think about you guys, I see the marriage and relationship that Jason and I strive for. You guys make it seem so easy and I love that you are open to tell us how to get there (even the embarrassing parts). You don’t hide your failures which is something that most don’t share. It shows your heart is real.

The Senz: How did I even get to know you guys? I think probably by accident but it seems like we are family. I LOVE IT. Donna, you girls are amazing and so are you. It is almost like you are transparent with your life.

Dawn Frazier: Wow!! Where did our friendship come from? It started with a wedding huh? Keep that smile on your face girl. I know that life seems so unfair sometimes and it feels like you are NEVER gonna find that prince but he is out there! Make him pursue you the way you deserve.  Your heart is precious…treat it that way!

Jessica Norris Fletcher: You never let me go there! You know that place that I dislike so much; where I wanna complain about people or God. I fall off my pedestal and you put me right back up there. My heart appreciates your heart. Your worship is contagious. The best part is that you don't even know you have this affect on me!

Brittany Willis (Olson): I long to know you. That is funny huh? Have you ever seen anyone you just want to be friends with but don’t know why? You are one of those people. Let’s see where this goes! I can’t wait for the Royal Wedding! Do you need a photographer?

Heather Seyer: Connected! That is what we are! When I am confused to no end and feel like craziness is taking over I just look for you on Facebook and you talk me down  I am so glad that we went through “stuff” together at the same time. I am learning more from you than you can imagine!

Jennifer Harms: When I see you I see a caterpillar. Inching along in life so cute and fuzzy having no idea that one day you will become such an amazing butterfly. Don’t fight the chrysalis. It’s part of growth. I happen to think it’s the ugly part but it is the most important. You have to trust that while you are doing that growing no one around you will harm you! Open up to us. I promise we will only love you! I love you already! You are an impeccable photographer! Live your dream!

Kristen Miller: Weird that you get two sections! Once as an Allen and once as a Miller! It seems like yesterday that we would sit in the office and talk about life. That Jeremiah kid drove me nuts; on again, off again lol. Look at you two now. I know that you might not see it but you guys are an inspiration. Don’t ever think that because you guys are young, you are unable to offer great advice on everything. I LOVE IT…Did I mention that you are the best cake maker in the world?

Jacob Olson: Without you my dreams would be lost!

Becky: No matter what happens you are there. Ups and downs happen but we make it through. We have too. I mean seriously…how would we survive otherwise?

Kim Barnes: There was a time I would rather throw a rock at you than talk to you. Don’t take offense girl…you know what I am talking about. The softness that I have seen your heart take on in the past two years is breath-taking. Keep listening to God. You honestly bless me beyond belief. You being at work with me is a life-saver! God has prepared you for such a time as this!

Linda Olson: I am drawn to you and am not sure why but I will figure it out 

I know that I know I am forgetting someone for something so expect me to add to this all the time. I just want you all to know how much I love and appreciate you. Without you guys, I honestly would be lost. I am glad that I am realizing how much I love people. It is good for the heart!